Self-love isn’t selfish. It’s the foundation for our lives. When we nurture ourselves first with loving thoughts, actions, and healthy boundaries, we create an overflow to freely share with others.
Holli Sharp, Science of Mind
While the concept of loving self first is sometimes debatable, I fully agreed with it. For most of the years of my life, I detested myself. Before I came out, I refereed to myself in the third person as “that damned queer.” After I came out, I just believed I was worthless. Ironically, I felt mostly competent when doing my work in the AIDS program then in higher ed, but personally, I was a wreck.
And then I learned about self-love and a big “aha” whomped me upside the head like a 2 x 4, and I knew what my personal work needed to be.
Today, I’m the most important person in my life and my self-love is powerful. I do believe that my self-love is one of the many gifts from my Higher Power, the gift that allows me to love others, especially my beloved, with tremendous passion. My self-love allows me to be vulnerable, to be truly visible to my beloved. My self-love is forgiving – of myself, of others – and allows me to feel tremendous gratitude for my health, my body, my abundance, my family and friends, and for my beloved.
I’m grateful for these days of my life, grateful for the sadness I feel for the loss of my sister Sherry is counteracted by the fact that I know she’s my new guardian angel and is with me every moment. I’m grateful for the life Kelly and I are building, even in this later stage of life, and I’m grateful for the opportunities that the Universe has presented to me.
On this day in LGBT history (from QUIST, Lavender Effect, Back2Stonewall, and/or Wikipedia. (If you are unsure about accuracy, please do your research and let me know. Thanks!)
1702, UK – Anne became queen of Great Britain. Around 1671, she had met Sarah Jennings with whom she had a close relationship for nearly 50 years. Her relationship turned negative over time due to politics. Sarah started rumors that Anne was a lesbian and threatened to make their love letters public. Anne dismissed Sarah from the court forever. Ahhhh, love hath no fury….
1970 – In the wee morning hours, New York City police raid a gay bar called the SnakePit, arresting 167 patrons. At the police station, one of the arrestees, an Argentine national named Diego Vinales so feared the possibility of deportation that he leapt from a second-story window of the police station, impaling himself on the spikes of an iron fence. He survived, though firemen were forced to cut out a section of the fence with Vinales still skewered on it, in order to move him to the hospital. One journalist remarked, “It is no crime to be *in* a place that is serving liquor illegally, the only crime is to run such a place. There were no grounds for hauling the customers away.” Though charges against other patrons are dropped, Vinales was rebooked for “resisting arrest” and officers are stationed outside his hospital room to prevent another escape
1979 – The New York Times runs a front-page photograph of six men being executed by firing squad in Iran for allegedly having committed crimes of “homosexual rape.” Since the Ayatollah Khomeini’s rise to power just four weeks earlier, there have been growing reports of gay men — as well as Jews, Baha’is, “blasphemers,” “heretics,” former members of the Iranian aristocracy, and others — being blackmailed, imprisoned, tortured, dismembered, hanged and/or shot. By the time Khomeini gets around to celebrating his first anniversary of his Islamic revolution, the body count is in the thousands.
I encourage you to write your stories. If you’d like to see your memoir and stories in print, let’s work together. I can help you self-publish your work. If this interests you, please see my website at http://purpledistinctions.com/self_publishing.html
Write your story! Now is good!